Relationships are complicated. We hear this very often. And it is true.
Our lives are constantly marked by inner and outer conflicts. It is in our human nature to oppose others, to feel mistreated, prejudiced, discriminated, victims of micro-aggression, to face misunderstandings, lack of communication, frustration and annoyance in our encounters with others.
We struggle with our family, friends, couple life, school, work, neighborhood, members of our local community, also members of various social, religious and political groups.
Couple relationships can be in particular difficult. They involve love, infatuations, sex, desire, jealousy, betrayal, commitment, insecurity, and when the communication is poor and partners carry within them unhealthy patterns of behaviours form their past, it can become really hard to manage.
Relationship issues are complex. They cross the border of social norms and indoctrination and involve commitment, responsibility, trust, love, respect, and many other values and expectations that are culturally conditioned and make any conflict resolution difficult.
Some of our conflicts are being dealt with appropriately, but many will remain brushed under the carpet, whilst we are using all sort of defenses and distractions to ease your inner pressure and suffering.
Most times our conflicts are not discussed properly, and the emotions associated with them are not processed fully to ease the distress and preserve our wellbeing.
Left unfinished, they are adding to the weight we carry within our souls and minds, and make our movements through life slower and more painful, regardless if we are aware of it or not.
We all like to feel heard and understood in a relationship, however a fast dynamic involving power and control clashes with the hope for harmony and the history of being in a relationship the partners bring with them.
The most difficult conflict you’ll have to handle will be however your internal life, the relationship you have with yourself. You might struggle with identity confusion and a variety of negative emotions that can be difficult to handle.
As a result of that, you might have existential questions, depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, low sense of self-worth, lack of motivation, procrastination, etc.
The myth that “all troubles will be gone tomorrow”, or that “issues resolve by themselves” make the matters worse and add to the consequences.
The good way to manage a problem in a relationship is to acknowledge that problem and create time and space to sort it out, because at stake is your wellbeing, which is more important than any ego, ambitions and principles in life.
To talk about a difficult relationship in your life, email me in strict confidence at: firstname.lastname@example.org, or schedule an initial chat: